Mere Raises A Baby

Sorry in advance, future generations!

Spring forward, right off a cliff.

Whose brilliant idea was the stupid time change? (DON’T EMAIL ME!) I thought it was a dumb idea when I was working and in school and stuff because really, it just throws everything off but now with a baby who has chosen his own schedule, I must ask: ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? Baby A has chosen what I consider to be a reasonable bedtime. At some point between 8 and 9 he gets fussy, I feed him, rock him, and he’s off to night night land. It works because by then D has been home a while, I have gotten a few things done, and it’s a good stopping point for me to take a little while and let him go to sleep.

But now, thanks to some jagweed from 100 years ago, Baby A has no idea when to go to bed. You might think that he would just go to bed an hour later than he did before, but no. Thanks to his confusion, it’s really hard to get him bathed or anything before he just decides to lose it (you’ve gotta get that done before he gets sleepy or else you’re just bathing a squirming pile of screams that hates you) and having to tiptoe around our bedroom after he goes to sleep at an unpredictable time is…I’m not a fan of it.

And Baby A is awesome at a lot of things but one thing he’s never really gotten the hang of is “wake up time.” He is usually up to eat sometime between 4 and 5, but in the past he has always gone right back to sleep, providing me and D with a couple more hours of much-needed rest. Now? Not.

So I’d like to extend the sincerest of middle fingers to the whole time change in general. Go home, time change, I hate you.

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Sorry I can’t hear you, I just blew away.

Not to sound like a 90s stand up comedian, but what is the deal with this weather lately? I’ve lived twentysomething years in the same area and I don’t remember ever having these wind storms like this. At first it was fun, because watching empty shopping carts ghost ride across parking lots and seeing every trash can on my street get knocked over at the same time is kind of hilarious but now it’s just getting bananas. My front yard looks like a pile of dead leaves (because that’s what it is), there’s constantly junk blowing in to our pool, and I’ve had to wander out into the back yard on more than one occasion to rescue my patio furniture from the neighbor’s fence. You guys THE WIND MADE ME GO OUTSIDE! Unforgiveable.

Getting out of the car last night I got hit with about a million leaves, twigs, and whatever else was flying around on the breeze. Was not aware that it could rain leaves, but I found that out that it can, and they will fly into your car and land in your drink. Am I being dumb? Has spring always been like this and I just wasn’t paying attention? Or has this been a little extra ridiculous this year? Stop it, weather, you’re drunk.

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Quit your job, start a blog.

Isn’t that what everyone is doing these days? In my case I already HAD a blog but I have neglected it for so long that it just seemed easier to start fresh with a new one instead of trying to reinvent or resurrect what was already there. It’s still available online for your reading pleasure, should you ever feel the need to read a few years’ worth of complete nonsense and whining. Not to say that there won’t be an abundance of nonsense and whining here, I’m just saying if you want to read the crap I’ve already written then by all means, check out my old stuff.

Oh, right, so new blog, sorry: Here’s my new blog. It’s shiny, and smells good, and it’s about my weird, wonderful new life as an at-home mom to my son, Baby A.

I never expected to be the “at-home” mom type. My mom stayed home with me and my sister until we were both in elementary school and that was fabulous, but I always expected that I would work. I’m not particularly career-driven, I worked in social work for the three years between graduating from college and the birth of my son, but I never saw myself being a life-long social worker. I just always thought I would work SOMEWHERE. That changed last year so suddenly that I don’t even remember it happening. Baby A was born in July and I was due back at work in October. We had picked out an incredible daycare (the only daycare in the county that met my standards LOL) and I had added the baby to my health insurance through my job. By the first of September I had made up my mind, even if I hadn’t told anyone: I wasn’t going back.

I was almost a little bit embarrassed to tell D (my husband, in case you’re here by accident) that I wanted to stay home after being so sure that I would be back at work, changing my mind seemed silly. D was wonderful though. He just told me that he understood and we would make it work. Telling my boss was a whole other thing. I cried. On the phone. Like a bitch baby. You guys, I can’t even tell you, my old boss was one of the sweetest and most patient people I’ve ever known. I felt guilty, like I was letting him down, when I told him that I wasn’t coming back. As I should have guessed, his response was beautiful: “That’s great that you are going to stay home with your baby! You technically have maternity leave until October, let’s just wait until then and we’ll talk again.” Seriously. Nobody guilt-tripped me, nobody ridiculed me, they just supported me.

It still felt weird. I’ve quit a lot of jobs in my day (some jobs more than once). My friends like to throw parties when I quit my jobs, just because I quit a lot of jobs and they like to have a lot of parties. But I’ve never quit a job with nothing else to go to. It’s always been that I quit because I had something else to do that wasn’t compatible with what I had been doing: returning to school, moving, starting another job someplace else, etc. This was different. It was also a bit of a leap of faith, like that first second that an airplane takes off and suddenly you’re off the ground in midair with nothing to support you but a little bit of physics and some atmosphere and maybe some prayers (I take Xanax to fly, can you tell?) but somehow it works. A little bumpy, maybe, but steady enough.

So here we are. 8 months (ish) later and going strong. Many, many setbacks and learning curves along the way but making it work nonetheless. Raising a baby. An awesome, adorable, strong little baby. So this is our story.

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